9:50 a.m. - 2018-07-12
A Yarn.
Well hello there, non existent audience! Today I'm going to spin you a yarn of a friendship gone wrong. This is the story of how someone tried to convince me what a terrible person I am. But in order to give you a good idea of how this all began, let's go back to 2007-2008, the year I turned 18. I was super into writing Harry Potter fanfic and I made a couple of friends doing so. For the sake of anonymity, lets call this specific person I'm writing about Amy. Amy was fucking cool as shit, she dug my work and even beta read for me over the due course. The online friendship progressed to texting and phone calls late at night. I thought Amy was the shit. I was even contemplating going and seeing her, though that never happened, thankfully. She eventually lost phone service so we were sort of out of touch for a while, but still spoke over facebook and such. She made another close friend and sort of just forgot about me. My feelings weren't hurt. I'm an adult, shit happens, people grow apart. That's just life.
Now, Amy had this habit of exaggerating and even lying and even though I knew she was lying, I still sort of went with it. Let the girl have her fantasies. I've met several people like this in my almost 30 years of life now. It's fine. Let people do them as long as they aren't actually hurting anyone. But I had no fucking idea that Amy would take shit to the extreme that she did take it.
So to get to the meat of the story, which takes place in 2017, I'd lost both of my grandparents by that point and was in a pretty shitty place. Hank and I went to a wedding party for someone that worked for him and at the party they had a "suggestion box" where people could write advice for the newly weds. I jokingly told Hank to write something like, "There's no such thing as divorce when you can just get a life insurance policy." Hank of course wrote no such thing. I've been married a while, I'm pretty cynical and my sense of humor is admittedly a bit on the darker side. I thought it was funny so I posted about it on FB. Amy, who didn't really ever interact with me all that much on FB, commented on it. Something stupidly sarcastic, I believe it was in doge format, about how unoriginal I was. I didn't know how to respond. Lizz (who I wrote about back in the day, and yes, we are still friends to this day, I've even gone to see her twice now), did however respond, as was her right, it's fucking Facebook after all, about how unoriginal Amy was being and pointed out her hypocrisy. It turned into a fight and Lizz ended up calling Amy a cunt, which she was being. The next thing I know, I'm getting messages from Amy and to be perfectly fucking honest with you, I can't tell you exactly what they said or what she was going on about but part of it was she was wanting me to apologize for Lizz calling her a cunt and to apologize for making a joke about marriage because I was lucky enough to get married before the gay community could.
This doesn't fucking fly. I am not about to apologize for anything of that nature because A: Lizz is an adult and I'm not her keeper. If she wants to apologize, that's on HER not me. It is not my place to do so for her. B: I am not responsible for the persecution of the gay community. Yes, I was lucky to be able to get married to the man I love but I wasn't personally preventing gays from getting married. I was fucking overjoyed when gay marriage was legalized on a federal level and still support my LGBT friends in all their endeavors. In fact, I've come to recently realize that I myself am bisexual. But that's a different story for another time.
I managed to smooth things over with Amy without apologizing for Lizz. Of course, during that point, Amy was telling me that I was being abusive and toxic. She told me she was having an gender identity crisis back in 2009 when we were talking all the time and that I was an awful person for not recognizing that. How in the FUCK am I supposed to know this shit if she's not communicating it to me? I'm not a mind reader, especially when we're only communicating via text and phone. We're a good 700 miles apart. I don't KNOW these things. But you know the fucked up thing? I was starting to believe her when she was telling me how awful I was. That, my friends, is called gas lighting, which is a form of abuse. So tell me, Amy, who is the abusive one here?
Here's where it starts getting a bit confusing a bit wonky, I'll try to be as clear as I possibly can. During all this, I get this review on one of my fanfics about how awful my story is, and how I was a mediocre writer but thought I was hot shit and how I wasn't, and how I responded poorly to bad reviews, which, yeah, is sort of true. Someone left a less than stellar review on the same fanfic about a year before, and I responded poorly to it, I'm willing to admit that. While it's no excuse, it was during the time that Grandma was dying from cancer and I was just in a shitty mood at all times. The newer reviewer also accused me of leaving a review back in the day telling another author to kill themselves. I looked at my review history. I found NO such review. So I responded to this newer reviewer on my livejournal, I tell them I don't remember having EVER told someone to kill themselves and that I found no proof of this and how I didn't think it was likely that I did any such thing because while I can be a bitch, I'm not a terrible excuse for a human being. I told the reviewer if they have an issue with me to please PM me so we can settle it privately. The next thing I know I get a PM from some girl who was the one I supposedly told to kill herself.
I know what you're thinking. What the fuck does this have to do with Amy? Well, a few days later, Amy and I are messaging back and forth and she casually lets slip that someone with my area code texted her telling her to what? You guessed it. Kill herself! And that someone was leaving hateful comments on her friend's tumblr page, their IP tracing back to Amarillo, telling him to "keep a leash on his bitch." I tell her it's not me doing it, I have no idea who would do that but that it wasn't me. And it wasn't. She then suggests that it's Lizz doing it.
-Record scratching noise- Hold up! WHAT?! Okay so here's the problem with this. Lizz doesn't live in Amarillo or anywhere near Texas. So those texts and messages were NOT coming from her. This is how I know Amy is yet again lying to try and make me feel bad about something I didn't fucking do. It takes me no time flat to figure out that the person messaging me about fanfic is fucking Amy herself. I'm not a fucking idiot. And I don't use Tumblr, it confuses the shit out of me and Lizz is in the same boat.
Amy goes to England for some concert for some band she's obsessed with. Take That or something. Idk. So I take that time to block Amy on every single platform she can possibly contact me on. I felt like that was the best course of action. She was making me feel bad about shit I didn't even do so I was done with it all. I even deactivated Facebook for about a month during that time just to avoid this bitch.
Amy gets back to the states and quickly figures out what happened. She messages Lizz telling her all this shit about how I apologized for her, how she knows I'm lying about FB being deactivated because her brother is on my friend's list. Which he was at one point but I had removed him long ago so yet again flat out lying. I tell Lizz to disengage, block her and don't let it upset her. Which she does. The next thing I know, I got an email from her about how hurt she was by me and how she felt I lied to her about not being upset about her commenting on my FB, which I wasn't, I was over that.
I was angry she had the fucking nerve to email me so I fired one back about how I knew she was a liar and how I didn't appreciate her trying to break up my friendship with Lizz and how she tried to make me feel bad about shit I didn't do.
I haven't heard from her since but the shit still pisses me off which is why I'm writing about it today.
Fuck you, Amy.
